foundChange: Trainings and Retreats - Learn More!
Melissa Perrin
  • Home
  • About
  • Services
    • Individual Treatment
    • Consultation
    • Speaking Engagements
  • Specializing In
    • Mood Disorders
    • Addiction and Recovery
    • Eating Disorders
    • Sex Addiction
    • Life Transitions
  • Blog
  • New Clients
  • foundChange
  • FAQs
  • Contact
  • Search
  • Menu Menu

Tag Archive for: blind faith

acceptance, disconnection, disunion, intimacy, love, lovers

www.theonethatgotaway.show

We met and made music and told stories about “The One That Got Away.” We did this at the Laugh Factory in Chicago last Sunday. An amazing night. Something I did not know I wanted to do until Billy Pacholski and Scott Whitehair offered the opportunity.

www.theonethatgotaway.show

We told stories about lost loves, missed opportunities, misunderstandings and bridges burned. We told stories about found loves, epiphanies, unconditional love and falteringly brave connections.

We told stories about risking and gaining and losing and gratitude for risking, gaining and losing. We had much in common and nothing in common.

An epiphany: I was so young, I thought relationships would always be like this so I let him go.
An epiphany: I deserve Better.
An epiphany: She crushed me. This was so hot. I lost myself…until it was no longer hot. Then I had to save myself. And I did.
An epiphany: We loose pieces of ourselves to those who love us; we gain pieces of those we love and hold them forever.

An epiphany: My authentic self must be enough. It simply must.

Intimacy Happens. It just does. It happens when we risk asking, telling, hearing. It happens when we allow ourselves to bump into each other for a moment, an evening or a lifetime. If I let myself, if I choose to release my self-focus, I am changed by one story. I am changed by you. If I let myself. Whether we are together for five hours or five years.

November 23, 2015/by Melissa Perrin
/wp-content/uploads/2021/10/Melissa-Perrin-logo.svg 0 0 Melissa Perrin /wp-content/uploads/2021/10/Melissa-Perrin-logo.svg Melissa Perrin2015-11-23 22:59:212021-10-14 22:24:45Totga at the Laugh Factory 11/15/15
acceptance, connection, love, protecting love

Life’s Terms

My family is hopeful about a new beginning . We spent some time, at dinner, planning what we could plan and agreeing to surf the waves of this beginning as they occur. Smiling, fingers crossed, brows furrowed, hopeful.

A short time later, I walked through the Botanic Gardens, wet and steamy after rain showers. Sounds of Santana, playing at Ravinia just a few blocks away, wafted over the eastern gardens and tempted me to jive walk over the bridge and toward the water garden.

As I moved toward the greenhouses to see Spike, the Titan Arum, the mood of the garden was somber as if in mourning. We had all been waiting for weeks to smell Spike’s aroma as Spike’s spathe opened to invite pollinators. Word had just gone out a couple of hours before that Spike wouldn’t be “blooming,” and therefore aromatic, as expected. Disappointment was as palpable as Spike’s aroma had been purported to be. I walked through, curious and intent on attending to Spike as I had for weeks [Geek status revealed: sometimes twice a day], regardless of performance.

Moments later I walked past a wedding celebration: boisterous, effervescent, joyful! Glasses clinking, guests smiling and laughing; bride and groom captured in surprised joy that they were held closely by so many.

And on to the prairie, walking through long grass that whispered “shh, shh, shh” in response to cicadas and mosquitos. Soft contemplation as I walked alone attending to the vibrant life around me. Life that was not advertised and did not have an audience. Life that simply lived: busy, quiet, successful, strident, waning, passionate nonetheless.

A night full of examples of life’s terms. Predictably unpredictable. Life happening in so many ways for so many people all at the same time. Some Santana fans wet but unstoppable in their desire to hear the music while the artists were close at hand. [Others stayed home, unable to be there in the rain.] Garden Staff and visitors adapting to news that Spike would do what Spike does, not what folks thought Spike would do. Bride and groom, family and friends, celebrating joy in one of the most beautiful spots in the world. And the prairie: passionate in its vibrance, overlooked in its constant presence. And our new beginning, not here yet but so vibrant and visible in its preparation.

Loving on life’s terms is simple: love while Life does what it does. Life’s terms can be vibrant, boisterous, disappointing, solitary, overwhelming, fabulous, unpredictable, breathtaking, crushing, quiet, full of jazz fusion, Pharrell Williams and John Legend. And Change waiting to happen…

September 8, 2015/by Melissa Perrin
/wp-content/uploads/2021/10/Melissa-Perrin-logo.svg 0 0 Melissa Perrin /wp-content/uploads/2021/10/Melissa-Perrin-logo.svg Melissa Perrin2015-09-08 15:57:032021-10-14 22:24:46Life’s Terms
love

Loving….

…on Life’s terms takes presence, attention and attunement.

Love cannot thrive in complacency.

Love demands attention, mindfulness and focus…with a dash of blind faith, that faith that doesn’t demand complete understanding or perception.

Loving on Life’s terms is a partnership in which the Couple, that creation of two people, is tended to as if it were a child.  That same level of focus, care and stewardship.

Loving on Life’s terms is accepting the child, the friend, the co-worker, the enemy as they are.  Understanding that they, too, are making their way in their lives.  [Even if we see clearly where and how they might change for the better….]

Loving on Life’s terms is understanding that soul mates are those folk who challenge us to grow into our more mature selves; those folk who do not let us rest comfortably in stasis.

Loving on Life’s terms means understanding that the person we love, whether romantic partner or fellow traveler, is making it up as they go along too.  For better or for worse.

Loving on Life’s terms means showing up.  Attending.  Closing the laptop, placing the smart phone face down [perhaps even turning it off….].

Loving on Life’s terms is opening.

February 14, 2015/by Melissa Perrin
/wp-content/uploads/2021/10/Melissa-Perrin-logo.svg 0 0 Melissa Perrin /wp-content/uploads/2021/10/Melissa-Perrin-logo.svg Melissa Perrin2015-02-14 09:00:162021-10-14 22:25:01Loving….

Categories

  • acceptance
  • algorithm
  • attunement
  • Belonging
  • children
  • community
  • connection
  • contraception
  • Covid-19
  • Curiosity
  • dating
  • disconnection
  • disunion
  • friendship
  • history
  • intimacy
  • love
  • lovers
  • Modeling
  • patterns
  • Post Traumatic Stress Resilience
  • protecting love
  • PTSD
  • Resilience
  • safe driving
  • Self-care
  • sex
  • sexual history
  • social distancing
  • Stoicism
  • Strategies
  • Teaching
  • Uncategorized
  • w
  • Wellness
  • wing woman
  • wingman

Recent Posts

  • 2.19.20 Breadcrumb [Presence]
  • The Best Balm for Anxiety? Action
  • Mind the Gap = Mind the Algorithm
  • Wading In…
  • What was it like?

Archives

  • June 2021
  • November 2020
  • October 2020
  • August 2020
  • April 2020
  • March 2020
  • January 2017
  • November 2015
  • September 2015
  • August 2015
  • February 2015
  • January 2015
  • May 2014
  • March 2014
  • February 2014
  • January 2014
Melissa Perrin Logo

Let’s Connect

847-864-8874

2530 Crawford Avenue, Suite 203 Evanston, IL 60201

Contact
© 2021 All rights reserved. | 1 Day Website by Bizzy Bizzy
Scroll to top

This site uses cookies. By continuing to browse the site, you are agreeing to our use of cookies.

OKLearn more×

Cookie and Privacy Settings



How we use cookies

We may request cookies to be set on your device. We use cookies to let us know when you visit our websites, how you interact with us, to enrich your user experience, and to customize your relationship with our website.

Click on the different category headings to find out more. You can also change some of your preferences. Note that blocking some types of cookies may impact your experience on our websites and the services we are able to offer.

Essential Website Cookies

These cookies are strictly necessary to provide you with services available through our website and to use some of its features.

Because these cookies are strictly necessary to deliver the website, refusing them will have impact how our site functions. You always can block or delete cookies by changing your browser settings and force blocking all cookies on this website. But this will always prompt you to accept/refuse cookies when revisiting our site.

We fully respect if you want to refuse cookies but to avoid asking you again and again kindly allow us to store a cookie for that. You are free to opt out any time or opt in for other cookies to get a better experience. If you refuse cookies we will remove all set cookies in our domain.

We provide you with a list of stored cookies on your computer in our domain so you can check what we stored. Due to security reasons we are not able to show or modify cookies from other domains. You can check these in your browser security settings.

Other external services

We also use different external services like Google Webfonts, Google Maps, and external Video providers. Since these providers may collect personal data like your IP address we allow you to block them here. Please be aware that this might heavily reduce the functionality and appearance of our site. Changes will take effect once you reload the page.

Google Webfont Settings:

Google Map Settings:

Google reCaptcha Settings:

Vimeo and Youtube video embeds:

Privacy Policy

You can read about our cookies and privacy settings in detail on our Privacy Policy Page.

Terms and Conditions
Accept settingsHide notification only